Light of Essence
by fayetonic
Summary: Dawn Summers is not an ordinary teen. Classified as a big ball of green energy, Dawn faces many obstacles that will shape her both physically and mentally. With positive and negative influences Dawn finds love, friendship, strength, and motherhood.
1. The Dream

Title: Light of Essence

Author: fayetonic (fayetonic@yahoo.com)

Authors Note:This idea has been stirring up in my head for ages. Note that this story is AU. To clear some things up, I'm upping the time line on Harry and Buffy years. This will help you understand the story better. So Harry was born July 31st 1992, meaning Lily and James perished in 1993. His first year starts in 2003. Also note that from help from Silent Obsessions forums, I assume Dawn was born in late August the month the monks created her in. I'm also setting the whole First Evil deal in 2007. Other than that mostly everything is the same.

Author Note 2: Also another reminder is that this fic is completely focused on Dawn and Faith. Credit to my beta Kaz. Without her I would be hopelessly lost.

Genre: BtVS/HP

Rating: PG-13 for now

Pairing: Dawn/Severus, Faith/?

Disclaimer:I do not own Harry Potter, Buffy, Angel, Charmed,orJoan of Arcadia.All credit goes to the writers. 

Summary: Dawn Summers is not an ordinary teen. Classified as a big ball of green energy, Dawn faces many obstacles that will shape her both physically and mentally. With positive and negative influences Dawn finds love, friendship, strength, and motherhood.

~*~Prologue~*~

It was a clear night but mostly everything was hidden beneath the dusty layer of factory smoke polluting the air. But if you looked closely, you could see a tall metal tower in the distance with a small figure hanging off the edge. The figure was Dawn Summers key, and sister to Buffy Summers, the Vampire Slayer. Dawn was currently leaning against a metal pole with her hands bound behind her back, and although no matter how long she struggled, trying to jiggle the unsteady pole, the ropes would not loosen. It would, however, leave red irritated marks on her pale but soft skin. She just wished someone would come to rescue her soon. Her wish was about to be granted, but not exactly how she expected. She recalled hearing soft but firm footsteps tread up the stairs. But as the person making them came into view, Dawn instantly recognized who it was. It was Doc-the lizardlike demon grandfather who had helped her months before. Her throat went dry, and she felt relief for the first time in days.

"You! You can help me! Untie me. Please? Help me, she's coming!" Dawn screamed hysterically at the old man, while watching as he observed his surroundings.

He turned his eyes to her.

"Well, it seems she's running a bit late is the thing. And uh, if her Splendidness can't be here in time to bleed you…" Doc responded. He slowly approached Dawn, drawing each step like it had been rehearsed before.

Dawn whimpered realizing that the man whom had been so kind before had the same insane glint in his eye that she'd seen in Glory and Ben. 

"Psst, hey kid." He whispered winking at her. 

"Want to see a trick?" Doc continued smirking as he saw the look of horror cross her face. Without warning, he produced a large knife that beamed in the moonlight. For the second time this day Dawn's throat went dry, as the relief she had felt earlier disappeared entirely.

Dawn recalled Spike trying to save her. However the blonde vampire failed, and was pushed over the edge, plummeting into a layer of bricks. 

"It's time, doll!" Doc grinned grabbing the bloody knife. It was the same knife used in stabbing Spike before.

He started with a series of small cuts to her stomach. Each cut made a thin slash through the purple material of her ceremonial dress, causing Dawn to cry out in pain.

"Shallow cuts, shallow cuts," He muttered slicing another cut. The blood flowed its way down to her toes, like a river of red. She closed her eyes her consciousness going back in time when her mother was alive, and everything was partly normal. 

"DAWN" a voice slid her out of memories. It was Buffy, she was here. 

Dawn could have sobbed with relief. "BUFFY!" She screamed gasping in pain. She was so happy her sister was here, that she didn't here Doc mutter ''This would be interesting.'' 

Buffy strode forth, not even pausing when pushing Doc off to his death. But the demon didn't die quietly screaming as he fell.

"Here," Buffy whispered undoing the tightly knotted ropes that left red burns on Dawn's creamy white skin.

The blood gushed off her toes, a few drops dripping off the edge. The drops met in midair creating a small, but growing swirling portal crackling in energy. A huge bolt of lightning opened an enormous hole in the street below. Dragons flew out flapping their huge wings while spewing fire, leaving buildings in flames. Different demons hovered in the air, cackling like the wicked witch from the movie 'The Wizard of Oz." 

Buffy led the limping Dawn to the tower entrance. However, the ground rumbled shaking the tower making the two both stumble. Easing herself to stay still Dawn tried to run past her sister. She knew she had to close the portal. Before Dawn could get away Buffy grabbed her

"What are you doing?" Buffy growled tightening her grip on Dawn's shoulder.

"Buffy, you have to let me go. Blood starts it, and until the blood stops flowing, it'll never stop," Dawn explained crystal-like tears flowing down her cheeks. Buffy stared at her in anguish until a peaceful look settled over her face.

"Dawn. the hardest thing in the world is to live in it. Be brave. Live, live for me."

"NO!" She cried. 

~*~*~*~*~

"NO!" Dawn awoke, gasping for breath and clutching her racing heart. She slowly inhaled air long, deep breaths to calm her erratic breathing. Rolling to the side where her pink luminous clock lay, the numbers informed her it was precisely 2:07 am. 

It had been awhile since she had that dream. She remembered that day, the fear, and the pain she felt when Buffy swan-dived off the platform. She quickly shook her head to stop thinking of past, Buffy was here, not happy but here. 

"One thing for certain-," she mused putting her long brown hair in a high ponytail. "It's going to be a long night."


	2. It's Magic

Chapter One: It's Magic

~*~*~*~*~

Much to Dawn's displeasure, the night went by quickly. The sun was over the horizon, and it was about time for her to get ready for school. The sound of someone knocking on her door shook her out of her thoughts. 

"Dawnie, time to g-get up-," Tara called through the thick wooden door. "Willow's making funny-shape pancakes." The blonde witch continued, her voice becoming more confident as she spoke. Hearing no reply, she assumed Dawn would come downstairs soon. Tara quickly sauntered away to see if Willow needed help with breakfast.

Dawn sighed, knowing she had to arise from the warm purple comforter. Pushing back the covers, she swung her long pale legs over to edge of the bed. Dawn stood up, her body stretching towards the heavens, and she smiled when she heard the crackle of her bones. 

Twenty minutes later, a freshly showered Dawn entered the kitchen of the Summers house. Immediately, the aroma of pancake batter filled her nostrils, making her stomach clench in hunger. 

She turned her attention to the two witches who were currently locked in a loving embrace. 

"Morning," Dawn called, helping herself to some orange juice.

Both eyes turned to her.

"Morning, Dawnie!" Willow replied, pushing a strand of red hair out of her face. Her face formed a look of satisfaction as she successfully levitated the batter into the frying pan. She was completely enthralled with the magic surrounding the air, that she didn't see Dawn frown. 

Tara did.

"Why t-the frown, sweetie?" she asked, watching as Dawn carefully masked her emotions. Ever since Buffy's death months ago, Dawn never let anyone aware of her feelings. Now that Buffy was back, Tara hoped that she would bare Dawn's heart. Unfortunately, Buffy was still trying to get back into the swing of things herself.

"Wills, don't you think that you're using too much magic?" Dawn inquired drumming her fingers on the counter. She winced inwardly, when she saw the look on Willows face. Nevertheless, it had to be said. Willow needed control, and if she didn't acquire it soon, Dawn didn't want to think what would happen.

A defensive look settled over the pagan's face.

"Are you saying I'm a bad witch, Dawn?" Willow demanded her voice becoming an octave lower. The green eyes that were so soft not a minute ago were now flashing in anger

.

Tara visibly shivered.

"Well-." Willow persisted impatiently. "Are you?"

Dawn opened her mouth to speak but decided against it. A beeping noise startled them. It was Xander, coming to bring Dawn to school. She thanked every deity listening for saving her from the wrath of Willow.

"That's Xander. Got to go, we'll talk later." With that, she bolted out the door, grabbing a pancake and her bag on the way.

~*~*~*~*~

"Hey, Dawnster!" Xander greeted as Dawn entered the passenger side, slamming the door shut.

"Hey," she replied, tuning out his various questions. She was too busy thinking of what occurred before. 

Dawn knew she was walking a thin line when questioning Willow. But someone had to do it. Everyone was too afraid to put down his or her foot when it came to abuse of magic. Willow's decent into black magic scared her more than any demon before, and Dawn knew that resurrection was wrong. She learned from her own mistake the first time when she tried to resurrect her mother. One thing for sure, magic always has consequences. 

And yet thinking of Willow always led Dawn to reflecting on Buffy. She loved her sister more than life itself, but Buffy wasn't the same woman from months before. She found that out the hard way.

~*Flashback: A couple of months ago…*~

It was Wednesday, about four in the afternoon, and the sun was still pretty high in the sky. Sundown was about an hour away. Dawn was quickly striding across the cemetery to Spike's crypt. She hadn't spoken to the blonde vampire in a while, and she missed the chats they had before. Spike was the only person who wouldn't walk on eggshells around her when Buffy was deceased. As she drew nearer to the crypt, Dawn could hear voices from within. The brunette pressed her ear to the gray stone walls, straining to hear what was being said.

"What're you doing here, Slayer?" the male voice asked. She instantly recognized it was Spike. But what was Buffy doing there?

"Make me feel, Spike." The female voice barely a whisper demanded.

"Luv, I'm a vampire! Grr, arg." He responded in disbelief.

"I was in heaven, Spike. I don't feel anymore. Make me feel," 

A sound of an impact reached Dawn's ears, followed by a moan. Turning slightly, she quietly tiptoed to the door that was opened a crack. The Key gasped in shock at what she saw. It was a naked Buffy on top of a naked Spike on the dirty floor. Dawn's gasps were drowned out by the moans of both parties. Slamming the door shut, she ran as fast as she could. She needed to get away.

~*End Flashback*~

"Dawnie, Dawnster, Dawn!" Xander called. 

She turned towards him and frowned when she saw the lines of worry etched on his face.

"Sorry, Xand, I was lost in thought," Dawn replied running her fingers down her book-bag.

"I've been trying to get a hold of you for the past five minutes. You must have been in Mars," the carpenter joked, easing the tension between the two. "All right hurry up! You're going to be late."

~*~*~*~*~

Late she was, Dawn came to find out when she hurried to her first period class.

"Miss Summers, I trust that there is a reason for your tardiness?" Her math teacher coolly asked. 

Boy, was she in trouble.


	3. Potential

Chapter Two: Potential

~*~*~*~*~

It was two weeks after Buffy's demise, and everyone was still in shock. Willow was a wreck, her emotions causing magical outbursts, and Tara was the only one that could calm her down. Xander allowed himself to be consumed with his work, while Anya cursed D'Hoffryn for leaving her as a human. Giles had taken to drowning his sorrows in large glasses of whisky. Spike was killing every demon that had crossed his path, while Dawn rarely left her bed.

It was a week later that the whole gang assembled together for the first time since that night, and everyone looked worse for wear. 

"So, Glinda, why did you bloody gather us all here?" Spike was the first one to break the silence. The blonde vampire had better things to do then sit around, and twiddle his thumbs.

"Demons aren't gonna sodding sit around and wait for the Big Bad," he continued.

"Shut up, Goldielocks!" Xander growled.

"What are you going to do, boy? Mock me?" Spike snarled sarcastically, lifting a platinum eyebrow.

"Guys just stop it, please!" Willow snapped, loosing her patience.

Xander opened his mouth to speak, but found that no sound was coming out. It was like the time the Gentleman came into town, except it was Wicca magic that had silenced him, or so he assumed.

"The p-point is that we n-need to get on with our lives. B-Buffy would want us to." Tara declared, speaking for the first time. 

Everyone flinched at the blonde slayer's name.

"Be brave, live. Live for me," Dawn quoted in a whisper. She was seated on the couch, with her knees underneath, clutching Mr. Gordo to her chest. Her face was pale and both eyes looked black and blue. Dawn looked like she had not showered for days. 

Not a single eye was dry when Dawn spoke.

"She's right, Buffy would have wanted us to live. It's time to get on with our lives!" Willow voiced, masking the resolve face in place.

So it began, everyone moving forward with his or her life. Of course, they grieved when they had the chance, but slowly everything was turning out to be okay. Xander spent more time around everyone. Willow's outbursts were rare, and Giles became more and more sober. Anya counted money which seemed to calm her, and Dawn was learning to research different demons, hack into different databases, and basic defense training from the Scoobies.

Just when they started accepting death, Buffy arose from her coffin. Willow the cause of her aliveness.

Xander was happy she was back. In his eyes, life was slightly more normal. While Tara worried if there were after effects of the spell. Giles scolded Willow for working a dangerous, black magic spell. And, Willow gloated in the success of her spell. Dawn felt confused and joyful about her sister's resurrection.

~*~*~*~*~

"Miss Summers, have you been listening to anything I've said?" Principal Montgomery demanded in frustration, peering intently at Dawn over his golden rimmed spectacles.

Hugh Montgomery was a strict man, but he had a kind smile. His trust into giving second chances was greatly appreciated by the troublemaker the teens parents, or in Dawn's case guardian.

"I'm sorry, I haven't," Dawn bluntly replied.

A frosty white coat of recent paint covered the walls. Framed awards and pictures hung in view, while dozens of books lined the long wooden stained shelves. In the middle, there was an oak desk with two chairs in front side by side. Dawn was currently occupying one chair.

"Do you know how much potential you have, Miss Summers?" The balding man asked, annoyed by Dawn's lack of interest.

"Potential?" the brunette questioned, raising her arched eyebrow.

"Yes, you have potential. It's just how you use it. Tardiness is not acceptable in my school, Miss Summers." Mr. Montgomery replied, a slow smile appearing on his face. "Now, I want to see those grades up, up, up, missy!" He commanded, standing up to shake her hand. 

"Yes sir," Dawn agreed quietly.

The school bell rang, and Hugh quickly scribbled a pass for Dawn's next class.

~*~*~*~*~

School passed by quickly, much to Dawn's obvious relief. She hastily made her way towards the direction of the Magic Box, thoughts occupying her mind. Her feet moved on it's own accord, while she was lost in her own world. 

Taking a deep breath, Dawn turned to metal doorknob and entered. The sight that greeted her was what she expected. Anya was ringing up a customer who was purchasing what looked like incense. Xander munched on some snacks, while Tara and Willow were studying large texts. Dawn jumped as she heard the sound of pain echo from the next room. It looked like Buffy was training, Giles at the receiving end.

"Honey, I'm home!" she called walking towards the round table.

"Amer Moo Awnster" Xander greeted his mouth full of chips.

"What did you say?" Dawn replied amusedly, her blue eyes glinting as she watched him swallow.

He swallowed and cleared his throat.

"I said afternoon, Dawnster!" he greeted clearly.

Just then, Buffy came through, followed by Giles who was holding ice to his jaw. The blonde slayer was wearing gray sweat pants, with a white tank top. Her hair was put up into a messy bun.

Buffy's hazel eyes locked onto Dawn's.

"Dawn, is there anything you want to tell me about?" she asked, a frown settling on her pale face.

The Key tilted her head, trying to look innocent. "What do you mean Buffy?"

Buffy huffed angrily blowing her blonde bangs away from her face.

"I mean, why haven't you been going to class? Not to mention that you've been late to school six times, Dawn!" Buffy scolded her face emotionless, while her fists were clenched, betraying how angry she was.

"Gee, Buffy, it's amazing how it only took a call from my principal to show you that I actually exist." The brunette snapped sarcastically. 

Buffy opened her mouth to reply but Dawn's raised hand silenced her.

"Forget it, Buffy! Just, go on and ignore me, it was better that way. Don't forget to stop by Spike's crypt on the way home. I know how much he loves you taking your frustrations out on him!" She shouted, ignoring everyone's shocked stares.

Sobbing, Dawn grabbed her book-bag and bolted out the door. She didn't stop running until she came upon her street.

Home sweet home, Revello Drive.

~*~*~*~*~

Dawn pulled out a key from the back pocket of her denim jeans. She shakily inserted it into the keyhole, twisting so it unlocked. Entering the house, Dawn carelessly threw her bag over on the couch. The brunette ran up the familiar stairs to her room, where she flopped onto her twin-sized bed. 

She hadn't meant to yell, but she was so sick and tired of everything. Dawn wished her mother was here with her, stroking her hair and muttering soothing words. But Joyce Summers was dead, and Dawn never felt so alone.

She needed to leave Sunnydale and get away from the responsibilities the Scoobies demanded from her. Mr. Montgomery was right she did have potential, she just needed to find some place where it was valued and needed.

~*~*~*~*~

"Goodbye, Sunnydale," was the last coherent thought Dawn had, before she fell asleep.


	4. Herself

Authors Note: To my beta, Kaz. I owe you so much!

Chapter 3: Herself

~*~*~*~*~

Feeling refreshed from the short catnap, Dawn yawned as she rubbed the sleep from her eyes. Muffled sounds reached her ears as she turned to look towards the door.

Dawn's blue eyes narrowed when she saw that it was opened a crack.

"Someone must have opened the door-," she mused to herself, as she eased out of bed. "I hope it wasn't Buffy! I'm certainly not ready to deal with Miss Psycho Blonde." Dawn continued, even though she knew that avoiding her sister was impossible.

Dawn's stomach clenched in hunger, and she knew that a lengthy conversation awaited her as soon as she stepped out of the comfort of her safety zone. The brunette softly treaded down the stairs, stopping half way from the bottom. She peered over the banister, craning her neck towards the living room as she tried not to be seen. 

A small smile crossed her face, as she observed the room. Willow and Tara were curled up together on the couch while watching television. Spike was seated in a chair off to the side, his polished fingers caressing a silver flask, like a bear caring for her cub.

The teen wrinkled her nose at the strong whiff of alcohol that wafted to her nose. Just as she was about to turn away to go upstairs, Spike caught her eye.

"Well, if it isn't Sleeping Beauty!" Spike drawled sarcastically, smirking in Dawn's direction.

Willow and Tara's attention diverted from the television to the scene that was about to be played out. 

"She's finally awake, Slayer," the blonde vampire finished, turning his eyes towards Buffy's direction.

"Dawn? Dawn, come here please." Buffy's voice echoed throughout the house. 

Dawn sighed, closing her eyes briefly. "Coming!" she yelled answering her sister's call. 

Slowly, she made her way down the rest of the stairs to the living room. The first thing Dawn noticed was that, Buffy had changed from her workout sweats to more suitable slaying clothes. Dawn watched as her sister carefully placed a short sword in her weapons chest. From the sparkle it gave, the weapon had probably just been polished.

Buffy looked up while wiping her palms on the front of her black jeans. "Dawn, I'm sorry for yelling at you earlier. I know, that I haven't been there for you, Dawn," Buffy apologized, looking at her younger sister.

Dawn looked up at the ceiling, as she blinked the tears away. She could feel everyone's eyes on her, but she refused to look down. The young teen could note bear to see the coldness in Buffy's hazel eyes. 

"Look at me, Dawn!" Buffy ordered.

Dawn refused.

"Dawnie, I said look at me, please." Buffy begged her voice cracking with raw emotion.

Dawn leveled her gaze with her sister. As their eyes locked, she could see a spark that was not there before. It was like the old Buffy was back.

Sincerity rained in the slayer's hazel eyes as she spoke. "I promise, I'll try to be there, Dawnie."

Dawn's throat tightened, as she heard her nickname once again come from her sister's mouth.

"Okay, Buffy," she agreed in a whisper.

"Alright, how about we all order out?" Willow asked cheerily, jumping to her feet.

Tara wiped her eyes promptly and smiled.

"How about Buffalo wings, and those little onion blooms?" Spike asked, rubbing his hands together. A hungry look crossed his face, as he thought about dipping them in some O neg.

The blonde vampire was met with several glares.

"Pizza?" Buffy questioned, looking at her sister.

"Pizza!" Dawn agreed, rubbing her growling stomach.

~*~*~*~*~

A couple hours later, a full Dawn plopped down onto her bed, her mind going over what had happened earlier. Dawn was happy her sister was taking an interest back into her life, but another part of her questioned how long would it last. She realized that Buffy needed to sort out her problems and that didn't include the time she needed to spend slaying. Her sister's schedule was tight as it was, and fitting Dawn into it didn't seem all that likely with any frequency. 

Dawn contemplated forgetting all about leaving Sunnydale, but her heart told her it was best to leave. She needed to grow, and learn, without people whom perceived her as a child breathing down her neck.

She had enough money left over from past allowances to buy a bus ticket to Los Angeles. Dawn figured once she left Sunnydale, that maybe she could call up her dad for money. Although he wasn't on the best terms with Buffy, the memories implanted into her by the monks told Dawn, that she was a daddy's girl. In L.A, she could rent a hotel room for a couple of nights, till she figured what she wanted to do with life.

Her mind was set, Dawn Summers was leaving Sunnydale.

~*~*~*~*~

If she wanted to leave Sunnydale, Dawn had to part quietly. First, she needed a new identity. The brunette knew that if she didn't obtain a false one, the Scoobies could easily track her. Getting the identity was pretty easy for someone with knowledge on hacking. She silently thanked Willow for drilling cyber knowledge into her brain, as her fingers flew over the keyboard.

"Yes!" Dawn cried happily, pumping her fist in the air. 

All eyes turned to her. Many regarded her as strange, while the librarian glared over the top of her glasses. She smiled a small smile and turned back to the monitor screen.

Dawn had just hacked into one of the most secure government databases. After creating her new name, Dawn now had a social security number, a high school diploma, and of course her birth certificate. Dawn arranged to pick up the documents at Sunnydale Post Office.

A few weeks later a Fed-Ex package would arrive, giving the teen her new identity.

~*~*~*~*~

Sure enough, two weeks later a bundled-up Dawn stood in front of Sunnydale Post Office. It was the first week of December, and the temperature had dropped to the lower fifties, leaving a chill in the air. Grasping the door handle, she entered the heated building. Dawn strode towards the front desk, smiling at the man whom was dressed in a black business suit.

"Can I help you?" he politely asked.

"Yes, I've come to get a package." Dawn replied, giving the brown-eyed man a smile.

"Name, please?"

"Joy Mayhem," Dawn easily lied, as she flipped her brown, highlighted hair.

"Can I see some identification, please?" He asked, running his hands through his dark hair.

Dawn inwardly groaned. How could she forget about I.D? Taking a deep breath, she said the first thing that came to her mind.

"Please sir, this package is important. It's from my sister in Washington, you see. She just gave birth to quadruplets. My mother is on her deathbed, and the doctors say she could die any minute. Her last wish is to see my sister and her babies. Since my sister just gave birth, she won't be able to make it!" Dawn sobbed, fake tears leaking from her eyes.

His expression softened slightly.

"Well, I suppose I can bend the rules, just for you of course."

A minute later the man returned with a white envelope.

"Ah, yes. Miss Mayhem, sign here, here, and here," the man instructed, pointing to the various lines.

Dawn did as she was told, making sure to sign her new name.

"Have a nice day!" he answered, smiling a full-teeth smile.

"You, too!" Dawn replied, re-adjusting her scarf as she walked out.

With legal documents to prove it, she was now Joy Mayhem, an eighteen-year-old who was born July 7th, 1983 in New York City. Her parents perished in a house fire when she was four, thus leaving her to bounce around from foster home to foster home.

That night, Dawn retired to bed early claiming she was tired. Using her large duffel bag, she packed everything she would need. Swinging her bag over her shoulder, Dawn easily climbed down the terrace jumping half way down as she stumbled to regain her balance. Revello Drive would always be apart of her, but Dawn couldn't help but feel sad for she had many memories in this house. With one last look at the Summers' property, the brunette turned making her way towards the direction of the bus station.

~*~*~*~*~

"You are now leaving, Sunnydale. Please come back soon!" Dawn whispered; reading the large white sign as it passed. At that same time, Buffy was opening the door to find out that her sister was gone. The only goodbye was a pile of letters waiting to be opened.

With some money she had saved from allowance, Dawn bought a ticket to Los Angeles. 

She had no idea what she was going to do, as she only planned a get away from Sunnydale.

"I really did it!" Dawn thought, as she observed the rising of the sun. The first rays of light hit the dark sand, reflecting it a soft golden color. The brown-haired girl realized wherever she may be, and whatever she might do, she would always have herself.

~*~*~*~*~


End file.
